Sam Heughan may be considered the sexiest man on television this summer, but Jamie Fraser has proven himself the sexiest man of the 18th Century. With his red locks, searing blue eyes, innocent smile, broad shoulders and Gàidhlig tongue-rolling r’s – he’s hot, hot, hot.
But can we stop objectifying him for one minute, ladies? Really. Let’s not forget, he’s educated and a master of foreign tongues, er, languages – including Scots, Gàidhlig, English (because there is a difference, ye ken?), French, Greek, Latin, a little Chinese, and a mishmash of Native American. I’m sure he picked up on Spanish, Italian, Hebrew, and Prussian at some point, as well.
He knows the bible like the back of his hand, has a mind for military strategy, is wise beyond his years, and has the steel fortitude of a nun.
Okay, back to objectification. You’re not here to read about Jamie’s head for figures. You’re hear to check out his fine figure. And I won’t let you down. Here we go again with a shiny new list of Jamie’s Top 30 Looks for Episode #103.
#30: Jamie’s Yeah Sure She’s A Bonny Lass Face – If you read my review, you know what I think of this scene. As annoyed as I am with Jamie, Claire isn’t much better. She really puts Jamie on the spot.
#29: Jamie’s Sorry I Dinna Remember Ye Face – Notice how different his smile is compared to when he looks at Claire? Night and Day. Have a heart, Jamie. You know what it feels like to pine, aye?
#28: Jamie’s Drink in the Face Face – He pretty much deserves this, being a bit of dog this episode. Boys will be boys, eh?
#27: Jamie’s Here Wench Take This Empty Glass To The Kitchen Face – Yeah, this is where I would have splashed the drink in his face. Crush over.
#26: Jamie’s Jerk Of The Head Face – Lesson #1 on how to be a man: Rip Your Ear Off. So many hidden messages in this episode. Did someone say jerk?
#25: Jamie’s A Man Enters A Bar Face – Castle Leoch is hopping tonight! Gwyllyn the Bard is in town and playing for two nights only. Jamie is stag and on the prowl.
#24: Jamie’s Dinna Tempt The Fates Face – He may be an educated man, but he ain’t stupid. Yep. There’s a big difference between book smart and street smart – or in this case, respectful of the Black Kirk superstitions. I love how Jamie makes the sign of the cross to ward off Claire’s pissing the spirits off.
#23: Jamie’s I Thought We Were Friends Face – Speaking of pissing off spirits . . . Dinna piss off the hand that bandages you, lad.
#22: Jamie’s I Bit My Tongue Face – Stat! Jamie’s tongue needs attention! Stick it out, so we can see.
#21: Jamie’s Do You Want Me Now? Face – Ooh, he’s a dog, isn’t he? We all know he’s using poor Leery to get to Claire. By the way, thanks for making me feel sorry for Laoghaire MacKenzie!
#20: Jamie’s Why Does She Want To Leave All This Face – Now, I feel sorry for Jamie. He just can’t figure out why Claire is desperate to get away from his ginger-goodness.
#19: Jamie’s How Do I Get Claire Alone? Face – It’s not hard, man. Just give her one of your looks. You know how. Try #1.
#18: Jamie’s I’m Working The Fillies Face – Are these the spirited fillies of which you speak, Jamie? You can’t seem to stay out of trouble around the ladies or the fillies.
#17: Jamie’s I Thought I’d Get My Ass Scalped If I Touched It Face – You say “skelped,” I say “scalped.” Oh, so many goodies in that single line even though I got it wrong. Where to start . . . where to start? 1) I’m afraid to ask, but exactly how hairy does one’s ass have to be to get scalped? 2) Touch what? Please be specific and descriptive. 3) An unrelated question but, does your ass look anything like Colum’s hairless kilt jewel?
#16: Jamie’s I Should Go Face – Let me finish that . . . Before Something Starts To Rise Again. And he doesn’t mean Claire’s blood alcohol level which is quite high at the moment.
#15: Jamie’s You’re A Miracle Worker Face – Yeah, I pretty much like Jamie’s face every time he speaks Gàidhlig.
#14: Jamie’s Overindulgent Face – Translation: You can overindulge on me any time, Sassenach.
#13: Jamie’s I’m An Educated Man Face – He knows he’s been a bad boy this episode and tries to impress Claire.
#12: Jamie’s S$*@ Why Did I Sit Here? Face – Never, ever, under any circumstances should a man sit between a woman he desires and a woman who desires him – unless he can handle the pain.
#11: Jamie’s Well This Sucks Face – Yeah, Claire keeps touching him but in all the wrong places.
Welcome to the Top Ten of Jamie’s Looks for Episode #103.
#10: Jamie’s A Man Has Needs Face – I hope you don’t think this is the same as #21. At this moment, he’s stealing a kiss from a young lass. In #21, he’s pretty much rubbing it in Claire’s face. I think this scene was perfectly written and aptly played. If Jamie had tossed Leery aside when he saw Claire, we’re back to jerk status. It’s bad enough he’s kissing someone he doesn’t really seem to like all that much, but she’s attractive and not preoccupied with thoughts of another man, so . . . I forgive you, Jamie. Give us a kiss.
#9: Jamie’s I Don’t Mind Face – Jamie doesn’t mind Claire seeing the scars on his back. Frankly, he doesn’t mind her seeing his front either, or what’s under his kilt.
#8: Jamie’s Chaffing Face – It’s amazing how the bandages on his shoulder are chaffing his groin.
#7: Jamie’s I Had A Good Tutor Face – Keep trying, lad. Claire’s distracted at the moment with thoughts of saving a young boy’s life, but she hasn’t forgotten you.
#6: Jamie’s Swollen Lips Face – Oh, she got you on that one, man! If you can’t stand the heat . . .
#5: Jamie’s I’m A Highlander Born And Bred Face – And we thank the Lord every day for that little act of creation!
#4: Jamie’s I Can’t Stop Staring Face – Jamie’s fallen hard for this woman and can’t keep his eyes off her face – and other parts of her anatomy. One day, Claire will be his Latin tutor . . .
#3: Jamie’s Still Staring Face – Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, man! Claire is a bit clueless in this episode showing her ignorance of the customs, but how the hell is she missing these looks? Oh, yeah. She’s trying to save lives. You go, girl!
#2: Jamie’s Lily Of The Valley Face – Oh My God. I could listen to Jamie say “Lily of the Valley” over and over and over over and over and over over and over and over over and over and over over and over and over . . .
#1: Jamie’s It Doesna Get Any Hotter Than This Face – This look requires multiple choices. Confession time, ladies. How many of you:
A) Forgot you were watching a television show?
B) Could feel yourself in the room with Claire and Jamie?
C) Screamed, “Claire, you fool!”?
D) Licked your television screen?
E) All of the above.
Whew! The looks seem to get steamier and steamier each week. I don’t know how I’ll survive putting together a Top 30 for THE WEDDING, but I’ll do my darndest when it gets here. You can count on me.
Outlander Episode #104: THE GATHERING airs on Starz on Saturday, 30 August in the U.S.
If you missed Episode 102’s Top 30, you can find it here: Jamie’s Top 30 Looks from Outlander Episode #102: CASTLE LEOCH
My recapped review for Ep103 is also available, here: A True Fan’s Review of Outlander Episode #103: THE WAY OUT.